Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Ten Hat Quips from Film

1. "My best friend gets hit by a streetcar, there's Civil War in Spain, we have an earthquake in Japan--and now you wear that hat!" --James Cagney, Great Guy

2. "I am constantly surprised that women's hats do not provoke more murders." --Charles Laughton, Witness for the Prosecution

3. "You'll find I mean business!"--Norma Varden
    "Oh, really? Then why are you wearing that hat?"--Jane Russell, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

 4. "Why it's just a hat, darling, belonging to a small-headed man of limited means who lost a fight with a chicken…"--Roger Moore, Live and Let Die

5. "And why do I sew each new chapeau with a style they must look positively grim in?/Strictly between us, entrez-nous, I hate women."--Danny Kaye, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

6. "Hello, handsome. Is that a ten-gallon hat or are you just enjoying the show?"--Madeline Kahn, Blazing Saddles

7. "I've met another man. He's the best man I've ever met. He's bright, handsome and he's crazy about me. And, he's married. There's only one thing; he doesn't like my hat."--Lena Olin, The Unbearable Lightness of Being

8. "Twenty years ago I made the unpardonable error of thinking I could civilize a girl who bought her hats out of a Sears-Roebuck catalog."--Clifton Webb, Titanic (1953)

9. "Do you mind very much, Mr. Shane, taking off your hat in the presence of a lady with a gun?"--Bette Davis, Satan Met a Lady

10. "I'm warning you, lay off - or you'll wake up one morning and find your hat floating in the lake, and who do you think will be under the hat?"--Bette Davis, That Certain Woman

First two pictures credited to the exemplary Film Noir Photos, and Joan Crawford's hat is credited to Mothic Flight and Flutterings


  1. One of my favorites is in Duck Soup after a missile flies into Freedonia's army base. Groucho picks up a busted straw hat amongst the rubble and says with righteous indignation, "Gentlemen, this is the last straw!" He doesn't explicitly mention the hat, but that line still says it all.

  2. These are great! I particularly love 2 and 10.

  3. You're right, Laura. That's a great one. DKoren, I'd love the chance to say #10 to somebody someday, but I know I could never say it like Davis.

  4. I find I must point out that the image of Deborah Kerr is not represented in the list. For the record, the film is the Life and Death of Colonel Blimp, in which Ms. Kerr plays three different characters. The image depicted here is meant to take place in the year 1901.

  5. Alexis, thanks for stopping by and commenting. I haven't seen you around before. Yes, I'm aware that the image comes from The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp. I included it based on visual value, the same as Greer Garson's hat from Mrs. Miniver and Cary Grant's hat mix-up from The Awful Truth. The images don't necessarily connect to the quips except as a visual complement.

  6. My first time being here, ever. I had to comment, since that is one of my ten favorite movies.